Secret Cat Seminar Caught On Camera!

Cute and cuddly by day, intergalactic rulers of unstoppable evil by night. Dogs are dumb animals, but not cats, no... they're with you out of mutual convenience. The cat can leave you anytime, because it's a survivor, it doesn't need you, you need it. A dog on the other hand is the favoured pet of those of lower intelligence. They were only ever intended as working animals, but somehow wound up in the home. It's at that point that the dog owner begins to believe that their dog understands them, not only what they say, but emotionally as well. That the dog is somehow empathetic to what's going on in it's owner's life. Wrong, the dog knows nothing, it's just a dumb animal, and if your dog is your best friend, then perhaps you and the dog aren't that different after all.

You may get the impression that I'm not a big fan of animals. You would be right. Unless it can work, is edible, or somehow supports the food-chain, I can't see the point of them. Some people think it's a good idea for kids to have pets, but they haven't thought it through. Pets don't live very long, however, just long enough for kids to form a tremendous attachment to them. Then they're emotionally scarred for life when the animal dies (usually under the tyres of a car, in a door or a lawnmower). That aside, I have no problem with animals!

Cats are the only anomaly in the whole thing. All other types of pet just do pointlessly inane things all day long. Not the cat, it has purpose, it has intent. It's one step ahead of the owner. Clearly, the cat has been on this planet longer than the human, and is therefore only biding it's time until the human race is in a weakened condition. Then it will strike and take control of the planet. They're organised (I hear them communicating at night), and their plans are afoot. See the photo above for a prime example of a cat seminar being busted wide open. The only reason that the photgrapher in question here was allowed to live, was because the cats know that their secret language hasn't been cracked yet! I could go on, but I'm getting bored of this now!