I was on my way home this evening, when I decided to take a slightly different route to my usual. I thought I'd got through the Trinity Centre and down to the railway station from there, seeing as I had a little time to spare. Well, I'm no sooner in through the doors than I found my way barred by a woman yabbling on about Dead Sea salts and before I knew it my hands were in a silver bowl covered in salt. What was happening? She reeled of a list of virtues possessed by this wonder salt, and how much my wife would appreciate it, wouldn't she? "No!" I replied. It's great for this, great for that, blah blah blah, and something about massaging it on to her feet!
Little did she know that I wasn't listening any more, because the bit about rubbing my wife's feet transported me back to a time when we were just going out. We were sitting watching telly, probably had a few drinks as well I'd imagine, when I took it upon myself to tickle her bare feet. I took hold of her left ankle with one hand and proceeded tickilng her foot with my right hand. That was my first mistake, I'd left one foot free. Second mistake, I wasn't looking at the free foot, my concentration was fixed upon the foot I was tickling. Her right foot proceeded to smack me across the face rather sharply. Apparently she wasn't so keen on the feet tickling, and she didn't hold back in making that clear. No time for words, just action!. I learned my lesson, I've never tried that again since.
Anyhow, I promised to return with the wife next time to see if she'd be interested. Yeah right! No prices were mentioned, but I'd imagine that salt that special comes with a fairly hefty price tag. I don't even put salt on my food to be honest! Anyway, the moral of the story is, "Never take your eye off the free foot, it might kick you in the face!"
